


Good-bye Means Nothing At All

by leo_draconis



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Infidelity, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-24
Updated: 2015-06-24
Packaged: 2018-04-05 22:59:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,391
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4198293
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/leo_draconis/pseuds/leo_draconis
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Author: Anonymous<br/>Songspiration: She Will Be Loved - Maroon 5<br/>Prompter: drarryxlover<br/>Title: Good-bye Means Nothing at All<br/>Prompt Number: 41<br/>Pairing(s): Harry/Draco, Harry/Ginny, Draco/Astoria, and a little something else. :)<br/>Summary: Harry isn’t looking terribly forward to a trip Ginny insists they take, but when he finds out at the last minute that she’s invited her new friend Astoria and Astoria’s fiancé, things become… interesting.<br/>Rating: NC-17<br/>Disclaimer: All Harry Potter characters herein are the property of J.K. Rowling and Bloomsbury/Scholastic. No copyright infringement is intended.<br/>Warning(s): Infidelity, some resolved angst.<br/>Epilogue compliant? Hell no!<br/>Word Count: 6391<br/>Author's Notes: I hope you enjoy this, lovely prompter! Title from “She Will Be Loved” by Maroon 5, the songspiration for this prompt and fic.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Good-bye Means Nothing At All

“Gin?” Harry called, toeing off his trainers and tossing his robes over the back of the sofa.  
  
“In the bedroom. Hang up your robes.”  
  
Harry rolled his eyes but did as he was told. “How was your day?”  
  
“Harry, really, you don’t need to yell. It’s uncivilized.” She appeared in the doorway.  
  
“Sorry.” He closed his eyes momentarily. Home half a minute and already he was wishing he’d gone out for the pint Abrams had invited him for after work.  
  
“Guess what I’m doing?”  
  
“Making dinner?” Harry said hopefully.  
  
“No. I’m packing!” Ginny beamed. “For our trip.”  
  
“Oh, right, that.” Harry thought he should probably be more excited than he was, but honestly, the ‘pre-honeymoon’ Ginny had insisted upon just seemed more like work than anything else.  
  
“And I have a surprise for you.” Bouncing on the balls of her feet, Ginny grabbed Harry’s arm. “Remember I told you I met another bride, the girl whose wedding is just a couple weeks after ours?”  
  
“Vaguely.” Harry did not.  
  
“Well, I was telling her about our pre-honeymoon and how important it is for a relationship. She thought it sounded like a wonderful idea too!”  
  
“That’s… nice? Are we  _having_  dinner?”  
  
“Stop worrying about your belly. You’re getting a bit soft around the middle anyway.”  
  
“I am?” Harry poked at his midsection. It didn’t  _feel_  soft.  
  
“ _Harry_. Focus. So we were talking, and we changed our reservation to a beach house with two suites!”  
  
Harry frowned. “Huh?”  
  
“They’re going to join us! Won’t that be fun? We’re going to look at the flowers on the island – they are supposed to be lovely, and we can have them brought in for the wedding. It will cost more, but you said I could have anything I wanted, right?”  
  
“Sure, whatever. So you want to take this trip with another couple?”  
  
“She’s my friend, Harry. I have almost no female friends and I really like her.”  
  
“Well, good, I suppose. What’s her name? I forgot.”  
  
Ginny bit her lip. “You didn’t forget… I never told you.”  
  
“So who is she?”  
  
“Look, Harry, you have to understand… don’t be upset. She’s so sweet and just brilliant, and I really value her friendship. “  
  
Harry sighed. “Gin, I really am hungry. And tired. Just tell me who she is.”  
  
“Astoria Greengrass,” Ginny said softly.  
  
Harry took a step back. “Wh-what?”  
  
“Harry, I know you don’t like Malfoy, but it’s been ages since school and I’m sure he’s changed. She’s marrying him, after all… and it’s an arranged marriage, but she’s so fond of him, so he  _has_  to be different. We’re all adults, aren’t we?”  
  
“You want me to go on vacation with Draco Malfoy and his wife-to-be.” Harry shook his head. “Where’s the punchline?”  
  
“I’m not joking. It means a lot to me that you’re okay with it.”  
  
“Have I in some way indicated that I’m okay with this?”  
  
“You’re the best,” Ginny told him, turning away as though he hadn’t spoken. “And I promise I’ll give you a special thank you in bed tonight. But I’ve got to finish packing – we leave in two days.”  
  
“Can’t wait,” Harry mumbled.  
  
He  _really_  wished he’d stopped for that pint.  
  
~~~  
  
The house was beautiful, with its own private beach and sprawling deck. Harry suspected he would appreciate the setting even more if it didn’t contain his very own nightmare.  
  
“I think they might have arrived already,” Ginny told him. “I’m going to find Astoria.”  
  
Harry trudged inside behind her, wincing at the high-pitched squeals that echoed through the spacious living room. Ginny was giggling with a small-framed blonde woman, but Malfoy was nowhere in sight.  
  
“I’m going to take the bags to our room.” Harry waved his hand to get Ginny’s attention.  
  
“You must be Harry,” Astoria spoke up. “We’ve taken the room on the right; I hope that’s all right.”  
  
“Sounds good. Nice to meet you.” Harry fought the urge to snarl at her. “Where’s your fiancé?”  
  
“He’s got a bit of a headache. He just returned from a banking conference yesterday,” Astoria explained. “He’s taking a nap.”  
  
“Harry, we’re going to take a walk into the village. We want to look at the flowers and see what there is to do this week. Do you want to come?”  
  
“No, thanks. I might take a short nap myself, walk on the beach… but you two have fun.”  
  
“We’ll be back in a couple of hours.” Ginny kissed his cheek and followed Astoria outside.  
  
Harry glanced at the closed door and took their shrunken bags into the room across the hall. He’d just finished resizing them when he heard a throat clearing behind him. He turned to find Draco leaning against the dresser.  
  
“Are they gone?” Draco asked.  
  
“Yes. Out looking at flowers – outrageously expensive flowers they can have transported in rather than using nice, reasonably priced, local flowers.” Harry stepped closer. “Still tired from your conference?”  
  
“Not even a little bit.”  
  
“Good.” Harry closed the distance between them and in moments they were pressed against one another, mouths fused and hands roaming.  
  
“Missed you so fucking much,” Draco breathed against Harry’s lips.  
  
“Mmm, me too.” Harry fumbled to undo Draco’s trousers, shoving them down far enough to grasp Draco’s cock.  
  
“Wait.” Draco fished a small vial from his pocket before discarding his trousers and pants all together, then turned around to bend over the top of the dresser. “Fuck me.”  
  
Harry groaned and took the vial, coating his cock and rubbing two fingers over Draco’s opening. “You want my fingers?”  
  
“Just your cock. Make it burn. Make me forget I had to use a fucking dildo all week instead of the real thing.”  
  
He lined up and pushed inside, hissing at the nearly unbearable tightness around his cockhead as Draco’s body worked to accept him. When he was fully sheathed at last he bent over, pressing a kiss between Draco’s shoulder blades. “Ready, gorgeous?”  
  
“Always ready for you. Fuck me hard, Harry.”  
  
Harry tossed his head back and moved, thrusting into Draco again and again until he could no longer stop his balls from emptying. “Don’t come,” he rasped. “Going to suck you… oh, damn,  _Draco…”_  
  
He came hard, filling Draco and snapping his hips until he softened. He pulled gently out and dropped to his knees, grasping Draco’s buttocks and parting them. He leaned in and swiped his tongue over Draco’s entrance, tasting himself on Draco just as he so loved to do.  
  
“Harry!” Draco panted, nearly sobbing as he thrust his arse back against Harry’s face.  
  
“Turn around.” Harry grabbed Draco’s hips and opened his mouth, sucking Draco’s cock in the moment it was presented to him. It didn’t take Draco long to finish – it rarely took either of them long when they’d spent so much time apart.  
  
Draco slid down the wall to sit beside Harry and they embraced again, sharing lazy kisses as they caught their breath. “So, fancy seeing you here.”  
  
Harry grinned. “My worst nightmare and greatest fantasy all wrapped up in one. I couldn’t believe it when Ginny told me who her new friend was. Did you have any idea?”  
  
“Of course not, I’d have told you. I knew she’d been spending time with some other bride-to-be, which was fine with me since that meant she had someone else to bore with wedding nonsense, but I had no idea who. She owled while I was gone to inform me I was taking the week off for some silly trip. I considered telling her to stuff it, but I knew you’d be gone all week anyway.” Draco rested his head on Harry’s shoulder. “I hated the idea of another week apart, so I thought a vacation might be a decent distraction. She didn’t tell me until we arrived that her new friend would be joining us, and that’s when I found out who it was.”  
  
“Gin told me a couple of days ago. I think they were trying to prevent us from putting a stop to the whole idea since they think we still hate each other.”  
  
“Oh, but I do hate you, Potter,” Draco murmured, turning to press his lips into Harry’s neck. “I hate the way you smell so completely edible, and the way I get hard just thinking of you… and most of all, I hate the way you’re marrying someone else in just a few weeks.”  
  
“So are you,  _Malfoy_ ,” Harry reminded him, tipping his chin up to kiss him properly.  
  
“Look around, Harry. What if this was all for us? What if we were all alone, celebrating our own marriage?”  
  
“I wish…” Harry sighed. “You have obligations to your family. I have obligations to the Weasleys. You and I… we…”  
  
“We what?”  
  
“We take what we can when we can.” Harry rubbed a hand over his eyes. “I feel so bloody guilty all the time. She deserves better than this.”  
  
“And me?” Draco whispered. “What do I deserve?”  
  
“You deserve better, too. You deserve  _everything_.” He wrapped his arms around Draco and held on, wishing reality would fade away.  
  
~~~  
  
“We saw the prettiest jewelry, too! You would love the little shops there, Harry.” Ginny picked up her hairbrush and sat in front of the mirror.  
  
“You know I’m not much for shopping, Gin. I’m glad you and Astoria are having such a great time.”  
  
“Are you not having fun? I know I changed things last minute and all but you seem to be getting on with Malfoy all right.”  
  
_I’m getting_ off  _with him even better_. “Everything’s fine. I’m enjoying the peace and quiet, time away from work. I’ve been doing some reading and sitting in the sun.” Harry turned away to pull the covers off the bed.  
  
“I just feel like we’ve hardly spent time together and we’ve been here four days already. Are you sure you’re having a good time?”  
  
“I’m having a wonderful time. And we’re together at night, right?” Harry swallowed back the face he wanted to make. He hadn’t found intimacy with Ginny to be much more than a chore for some time, but there, with Draco just across the hall, he felt as though he was cheating somehow. And he  _was_ , but not in that scenario.  
  
“Yes, we are. And look.” Ginny parted her dressing gown to show him she wore nothing underneath. “Do you like it?”  
  
“Yeah, Gin, of course.” Harry pulled off his shirt and took his pajamas from beneath his pillow. “I’m knackered, aren’t you?”  
  
“No, Harry,  _look_.” She slipped the gown off and crawled onto the bed, spreading her legs to reveal her newly hairless groin.  
  
“Oh, you… it’s all gone.” Harry scratched his arm. “That’s great.”  
  
“Don’t you like it? Astoria suggested it. She has hers done all the time.”  
  
“Yeah, looks good.”  
  
“You don’t seem very enthusiastic.” Ginny ran a hand over herself. “I thought maybe you’d like to give me a little kiss down here.”  
  
“Gin, I… I really am tired.”  
  
“Are you sure? Because I’ll return the favor…”  
  
Harry wanted to close his eyes. It was almost painful to watch her looking at him that way, so hopefully seductive, and at home it was much easier to navigate. But he could hear movement outside the door, reminding him he hadn’t put up their nightly Silencing Charm, and it made him ache to go see what Draco was doing. Was he brushing his teeth, and what sort of pajamas would he wear? In the year they’d been seeing each other, they hadn’t had the opportunity to spend a whole night together. He wanted that desperately.  
  
“Harry!”  
  
“Sorry.” Harry blinked. “I… we can do whatever you want.”  
  
“Well, I don’t want anything  _now_ , if you’re going to act so disinterested.” Ginny stood and grabbed her nightgown. “Honestly, Harry, I’ve done all this to please you – the least you could do is act as though you don’t find me repulsive.”  
  
“I don’t, I –“ He exhaled. “I really am sorry. I’m just tired. Too much sun today, I think.”  
  
“Well, see that you feel better by tomorrow. We’re going to that dinner in the village, remember? There will be music and dancing and I want to stay up late, and then make love until dawn. Romantic, like this is supposed to be.” She slid into bed and snapped off the bedside lamp.  
  
“That sounds delightful.” Harry pulled his pajamas on and crawled in beside her, leaning over to kiss her cheek. “Good night.”  
  
“Good night, Harry.”  
  
~~~  
  
Harry woke the next day to the most delicious sensation on his bare arse. Fingers stroked and spread his buttocks, and a tongue probed his arsehole…  
  
He yelped and jerked, then scowled when he heard Draco laughing behind him. “You scared me. I thought Ginny was molesting me.”  
  
“Yes, the reaction one  _should_  have when confronted with the thought of the woman he’s chosen to marry,” Draco said dryly. “They’ve gone off already, picking out dresses for the dinner tonight and whatever else they can manage to spend money on, I imagine. So I’ve brought you breakfast in bed, if you’ll roll over.”  
  
Harry did so, smiling at the sight of his naked lover. “And how did my pajamas disappear, do you suppose?”  
  
“The very sight of them offended me. I can’t imagine wanting to have sex with someone wearing such garish clothing.”  
  
“Ah, then they’re serving their purpose.” Harry clasped his hands behind his head and studied Draco. “I swear you get sexier every bloody day.”  
  
“It’s true. Is it a gift, is it a curse? And look at all this, just waiting for me.” Draco ran a finger up the underside of Harry’s erection. “As it happens, I came prepared.”  
  
“What? Oh,  _fuck_.” Harry hissed when Draco straddled him and sank down on his cock, already lubricated and stretched. “You’re incredible.”  
  
“Mmm. Here.” Draco took a strawberry from a bowl on the nightstand and traced Harry’s lips with the tip of the fruit. “Good morning.”  
  
Harry took a bite, sucking the juice from Draco’s fingers and running his hands over the flexed muscles of Draco’s thighs. “Delicious,” he managed as Draco set a slow pace for their lovemaking.  
  
“I seem to have forgotten the cream. You’ll have to retrieve it on your own,” he purred, taking one of Harry’s hands and placing it on his own erection.  
  
“My pleasure.”  
  
Harry stroked Draco’s prick while Draco rode him and fed him berries, and it was the most perfect morning Harry could imagine. They took their time, slowing down and speeding up in turn, until Draco arched his back and came with a moan so decadent that Harry couldn’t help but follow suit. He licked Draco’s release from his fingers and held Draco in place, thrusting upward a few more times until his cock was completely spent.  
  
Curled up beside him afterward, Draco sighed. “I don’t want to go home.”  
  
“Nor do I.” Harry ran his fingers through Draco’s hair. “But at least there we don’t have to depend on anyone leaving the house.”  
  
“Yes, we’ll always have our Monday and Friday lunches at Grimmauld Place.” Draco kissed Harry’s shoulder. “What if she pushes you to sell it?”  
  
“She won’t. She doesn’t want to live there, but I’ve explained that it’s important to me. So it’s ours for as long as you want it to be.”  
  
“And if I want it to be forever?”  
  
“Then we’ll have it forever.”  
  
“What happens in a year? Two years? You’ll have children and you won’t have time for me.”  
  
“You will too. Aren’t you supposed to produce an heir the moment you’re married?” Harry said, his tone harsher than he intended.  
  
“Harry…” Draco sat up and wrapped his arms around himself. “Don’t you… don’t you ever think that there could be more than this?”  
  
“More than what?”  
  
“ _This_. Us, what we’re doing.”  
  
Panic laced through Harry’s chest. “Are – do you want to stop?”  
  
“No, I don’t, I just… I want more. I love what we have and I hate it all at once, don’t you see? Every time I have you, I know you’re with me. The moment we get ready to leave I lose you to her again.”  
  
“I don’t know what to say to that. We… this has always been something different. Something on the side. You’ve been betrothed to Astoria for ages, and I was engaged to Ginny well before this ever began.”  
  
“You’re gay, Harry.” Draco took Harry’s hand and rubbed it against his prick. “This is what gets you off, not anything she has. She can’t make you feel the way I can, and I’m not just talking about sex.”  
  
“I know,” Harry sighed. “You know what you mean to me, Draco, but I made a promise, and…”  
  
“And you’d rather go on cheating on her and feeling guilty?”  
  
“Damn you, Draco, what do you want me to say?” Harry got out of bed and began to dress. “You’re the one who had a fucking contract drawn up, selling you to the highest bidder. You’ll lose everything if you break it. So why do we even need to discuss this?”  
  
“Because maybe you mean more to me than money!” Draco cried. “I have a job, you know, and I’m damn good at what I do. What if we let ourselves be truly happy and have more than just Monday and Friday lunches at Grimmauld Place? What if we have forever at Grimmauld Place? What if we can be together, for real, without hiding?”  
  
“You’re not serious.”  
  
“Deadly, Harry. I see you in bed this morning, the bed she was just in, and I think… how incredible would it be to wake up beside you every morning? To make love and  _stay_? Don’t you want that, or am I just fooling myself?”  
  
“I do, but you don’t understand.”  
  
“No?”  
  
“The Weasleys are my family, Draco. I don’t want to ruin that, or hurt them. Any of them. I’ve already done so many things they’d never forgive me for, and Ginny…”  
  
“Right, poor fucking Ginny.” Draco threw the covers aside and stood. “Let me make this very plain for you, Harry. I want more. I want  _you_. I want to be with you so much I’m willing to give it all up for you. My inheritance, my name, and  _my_  family. Because I love you, and you’re worth all of that and more to me. Do you feel the same?”  
  
Stunned, Harry shook his head. “Draco…”  
  
He took a step toward Harry. “Do you feel the same?” he asked again.  
  
“I… I can’t, Draco, it’s too…”  
  
“Fine. Then I suppose that settles that.” Draco crossed his arms, lips beginning to quiver. “I’d have done anything for you, Harry. I hope you understand that when you’re living in the prison you’re creating for yourself.”  
  
“Draco, wait.” Helpless to move, Harry watched him go and prayed he’d come back once he’d had a chance to calm down.  
  
He didn’t see Draco again until the evening.  
  
~~~  
  
“This has been so much fun.” Ginny beamed at Harry. “Astoria, I am so glad you could join us.”  
  
“I am, too. I’m happy you invited us.” Astoria nudged Draco. “And look at this – Draco Malfoy and Harry Potter at the same table, without killing one another.”  
  
Ginny laughed. “Who’d have thought, right, Harry?”  
  
Plastering a smile on his face, Harry looked at Draco. “Funny, eh, Malfoy?” His heart broke a little bit more when Draco didn’t so much as meet his eyes.  
  
It was difficult to participate in the conversation with Astoria and Ginny talking nonstop about their respective weddings. Ginny, who was acting as though things weren’t stilted and awkward between them. Astoria, who Harry despised because she had the privilege of being near Draco. And Draco, who sat silent and stony as though none of them existed. As though  _Harry_  didn’t exist.  
  
When Ginny dragged him to the dance floor he went dutifully, watching Draco lead Astoria around the room over Ginny’s shoulder.  
  
“Harry, this is getting ridiculous.”  
  
“Hmm?”  
  
Ginny huffed. “You’ve barely spoken to me all night. This trip has been a disaster. You barely touch me, you don’t want to spend any time with me, you’re not interested in anything I tell you about the wedding… I feel like you’re not even happy to be marrying me.”  
  
Astoria chose that moment to press her lips to Draco’s, and Harry could hardly contain his rage. “I’m  _not_  interested, Ginny. I don’t care about flowers or dresses or photos or any of the inane nonsense you keep telling me about. I told you to do what you wanted because it matters to you, but not to me. I just don’t care!”  
  
Eyes filling with tears, Ginny stepped away. “You’re a complete arse, Harry, you know that? I want to give you a beautiful day, the day we start our lives together, and you don’t care?”  
  
His head was beginning to pound. “I’m sorry. I care about  _that_ , I’m just not excited about the details like you are.”  
  
“I’m going for a walk. I’m sure you won’t mind being alone – you’ve made it clear that’s what you prefer.”  
  
“You’ve done a fine job of staying away from me all on your own, with your new best friend!” he called after her as she stalked away. Frustrated, he pushed through the crowd and walked until he found a deserted spot on the beach. It wasn’t long before the sand shifted beside him.  
  
“Way to make a scene, Potter, well done.”  
  
“This is all your fault, you know,” Harry said hoarsely. “You’re trying to change something that works just as it is.”  
  
Draco snorted. “Works well for you, perhaps.”  
  
“They are all I have, Draco, and they won’t forgive me if I hurt her.”  
  
“Then perhaps they aren’t the family you think they are.”  
  
“Coming from someone who’s going to be disowned if he breaks his betrothal contract.”  
  
“Perhaps, but that’s how I was raised. And they may not go through with it if push comes to shove. The point is, I’m willing to risk it. I guess this never meant as much to you.”  
  
“Don’t presume to tell me what I feel, Draco. You want me to change my life, just like that, and have no concerns?”  
  
“It’s hardly  _just like that_ , Harry. Remember when this all began, when I saw you at the Quidditch shop?”  
  
“Yeah.” Harry smiled. “You told me you could outfly me any day, and I took you up on the challenge.”  
  
“And I won.”  
  
“Cheated.”  
  
“Did not. I won, and as my prize I requested a kiss.”  
  
Harry rested his head on Draco’s shoulder. “I didn’t know what to do, so I just… kissed you.”  
  
“And about two minutes later our trousers were off and we were frotting like mad.”  
  
“It was brilliant. My first time with a man.”  
  
“You told me after that it was the first time you were glad you lost at Quidditch, and you smiled at me. I knew then, Harry. I knew then that something had begun that would come to mean everything.”  
  
“You knew then?”  
  
“I knew then.”  
  
Harry swallowed. “I felt so guilty. I swore I’d never do it again, and then… it didn’t stop. I don’t want to stop, Draco.”  
  
“I don’t want to, either, but I’m tired of being your dirty secret. Being here… this is too hard. I hate seeing you with her.”  
  
“I hate seeing you with  _her_.”  
  
“Have you fucked your fiancée during the trip?” Draco asked bluntly.  
  
“What?”  
  
“You heard me.”  
  
Harry closed his eyes. “Yeah. I mean, she expected it, so…”  
  
“Was it good? All warm and moist? Did you touch her there, kiss her there? Does she suck your cock as well as I do?”  
  
“Stop it, Draco. You know I’m intimate with her.”  
  
“I’ve never been intimate with Astoria.”  
  
“What? Really?”  
  
“Really. She’s aware as much as I am that this is an arranged marriage, and that any… extracurriculars… will be for the sole purpose of procreation and not for enjoyment, even though she tries to push for more occasionally.”  
  
“It’s different with me, Draco. We got engaged because we loved each other.”  
  
“And do you still?”  
  
“I’ll always love her. I’m not  _in_  love with her, but I do love her. She’s family.”  
  
Draco moved away and stood. “And so you’ll marry her, have children with her, all based on a lie, and that’s what you want? To leave me behind?”  
  
“I don’t want to leave you, Draco. We can still –“  
  
“No, we can’t. Because I want more than that, and I won’t settle any longer. I’d give up everything for you, Harry, and you won’t do the same, so I think it’s best we cut our losses before things get any more complicated.”  
  
“You won’t even try to understand?”  
  
“I’ve already tried. I guess I just can’t.”  
  
With a heavy heart, Harry watched Draco walk away and knew it was for the last time.  
  
~~~  
  
When he finally made his way up to the house it was dark, save for a light in the living room. He pushed the door open and heard a moan – a familiar female moan – followed by another. Frowning, he peered around the corner and gasped.  
  
Ginny was sprawled on the sofa, naked, with her legs wide open and her fingers toying with her nipples. An equally naked Astoria knelt on the floor, face buried between Ginny’s spread thighs. Ginny moaned again, the high-pitched moan Harry liked to hear simply because it meant she was nearly finished, and she began to spasm as she came.  
  
Harry couldn’t move for a moment, and when he finally tried to back away he ran directly into a table and sent a vase crashing to the floor.  
  
“Harry!” Ginny cried. She sat up and grabbed the throw from the back of the sofa, covering herself as though Harry hadn’t seen her nude a thousand times.  
  
“Sorry to have interrupted.” Harry cleared his throat.  
  
“I’ll see you later,” Astoria told Ginny, shooting Harry an apprehensive look before scurrying off to her room.  
  
“Harry, I’m sorry.” Ginny began to cry. “I had a lot to drink tonight, and I was so upset, and Astoria was being so nice… I told her you didn’t like what I did and how you never go down on me, and one thing led to another and we decided to do it to each other…”  
  
“You did it to her too?”  
  
“I did, but I swear I’ll never do it again. You’ve been so distant, Harry! I don’t know what’s wrong with us!” Her shoulders shook with sobs and Harry sighed.  
  
“Gin, it’s… it’s okay. I’m going to bed. You just… stay here, sleep it off. We’ll talk tomorrow.”  
  
“Do you hate me?”  
  
“Not even a little bit. Go to sleep.”  
  
Harry closed himself away, but he couldn’t sleep. Thoughts of Draco and Ginny demanded his attention and he wondered how he’d fucked up his life in such a spectacular fashion.  
  
He was going to have to fix things, once and for all, that much he knew. He imagined Draco’s face, so open and unguarded with him in a way the rest of the world wasn’t permitted to see, and he imagined Ginny’s, tears drying on her cheeks as she suffered the guilt of her infidelity, so mild compared to what he’d done. He was hurting them both, and it had to stop.  
  
He searched for courage as the sun came up, and rose to face whatever the day would hold.  
  
~~~  
  
“You’re awake.” Harry found Ginny sitting at the kitchen table with a mug of tea.  
  
“I am, yeah. I’m never drinking that much again.”  
  
“Probably wise.”  
  
Ginny chewed on her lip, a habit Harry knew meant she was worried. “Astoria and Draco left very early today.”  
  
“Today? I thought they were staying until tomorrow.”  
  
“Considering what happened… I think she thought it was best.”  
  
“Does he know?”  
  
“I’m not sure.” She drummed her fingertips on the table. “Harry… I am sorry, you know. I just think, well, maybe it’s a symptom of a bigger problem. Why don’t you want to have sex with me? And when we do, it’s like your mind is somewhere else. Why don’t you care about the wedding at all? I know you’re a man, but if you were excited to marry me then wouldn’t you be at least a little bit interested?”  
  
“Gin…”  
  
“Astoria told me she and Draco don’t have sex.”  
  
Harry coughed. “Oh?”  
  
“It’s an arranged marriage, you know, but it’s the only wedding she’ll ever have and she wants it to be perfect… but he’s not interested, either. And he doesn’t want anything physical until they have to.”  
  
“What’s this have to do with anything?”  
  
“She told me she’s pretty sure Draco is gay. She offered herself to him, you know. It’s his choice not to have sex. And she told me…” Ginny paused. “Well, she told me maybe by the time we get back I’ll be ready to join her club.”  
  
“What club?”  
  
“A figure of speech. She just meant that she thinks I’m in the same position.” She watched Harry cautiously.  
  
Harry blanched. “What?”  
  
“Harry, if you… if you didn’t want me anymore, you’d tell me, right? You wouldn’t lead me on out of some misguided obligation?” she asked quietly.  
  
Harry slumped into the chair and covered his face with his hands. “Gin, I… I never wanted to hurt you.”  
  
“But I’m right – you  _don’t_  want me.”  
  
“I’m sorry.”  
  
“How long?”  
  
“At least a year. I suspected before that, but for a year… I’ve known.”  
  
“I see. And how did you come to that conclusion?”  
  
He took a breath. “I’ve been sleeping with a man.”  
  
Ginny’s chin trembled. “For a year?”  
  
“Yes. I’m so sorry. I know it was wrong, and I always intended to stop, but I… I can’t.”  
  
“Why didn’t you  _tell_  me?” Ginny cried. “All this time you let me plan a wedding I won’t have… would you have married me, then? If none of this had happened? Would you have married me and kept a lover on the side?”  
  
“Yes,” Harry whispered. “If he’d agreed.”  
  
“You let me look like a fool.” Ginny shook her head. “I’ll be the girl jilted at the altar. The wedding is just weeks away, and you let it get this far? You’ve made me look like a fool. How could I not have seen? I thought you were always tired, or busy at work, when really you were running off to some bloke.”  
  
“I don’t know what I can say other than I am truly sorry. I thought it would hurt you more to leave, and your family would hate me.”  
  
“They’re your family too, you bloody arse!” Ginny exclaimed. “All this time and you don’t  _see_  that? I get that you grew up without your parents, but letting me live a lie to marry your way into my family is despicable.”  
  
“I know, and I am. That and so much more, Gin, I know. It just happened and I thought I’d get it out of my system, that maybe it would turn out to be an experiment, but it didn’t and it just grew and the thought of hurting you  _kills_  me but the thought of being without him guts me as well, and…” Tears tracked down Harry’s cheeks. “I’m so sorry.”  
  
“He’s important to you.” Ginny narrowed her eyes. “You love him.”  
  
“Yes, I love him.” And as he said it, he knew it was true. He loved Draco, and he’d allowed him to walk away.  
  
“Did you ever love me?”  
  
“I did, and I do. Just not the right way. Not the way I wanted to, or even the way I thought I might. Certainly not the way you deserve.”  
  
“And what do I deserve?”  
  
It was so reminiscent of the conversation he’d had with Draco just days prior that it felt like a knife to the chest, but he answered as he had then. “You deserve everything, Gin. From someone who can actually give it to you.”  
  
“Who is it?”  
  
“What?”  
  
“Your true love. Who is it?”  
  
He looked at her, eyes full of sorrow, and he saw that she knew.  
  
“So while Astoria and I were off together…”  
  
“Yes.”  
  
“In our bed?”  
  
Harry swallowed. “Once.”  
  
“He’ll lose everything if he leaves her, you know. He never will.”  
  
“He will. It’s me who resisted.”  
  
Ginny stared out the window then for so long that Harry began to wonder if she was plotting his slow and painful demise, and when she finally looked at him again he jumped. “I hate you, Harry.”  
  
For the hundredth time in the past day, his heart broke a little more. “I understand.”  
  
“I doubt that. I hate you for cheating to me, and for lying to me. I hate you for walking in last night and letting me feel like scum for something you’ve done a thousand times over. I hate that you thought you were protecting me when all you were doing was hurting me.”  
  
“I know. And I hate myself a little too, Gin. You have to know that.”  
  
“I hate that I will always love you, Harry, as the first boy I really wanted. The one I had, almost forever. Would you marry me now, if I forgave you?”  
  
“No,” Harry whispered. “I need him, Gin, and you need to be with someone who loves you with everything he is.”  
  
“Like you love Malfoy,” Ginny spat.  
  
“Yes.”  
  
“Most of all…” Ginny drew in a sobbing breath. “I hate that I love you enough to want you to be happy. So you go and get him, and be happy, but know that it will be a long time before I stop hating you for what you’ve done to me.”  
  
“I want you to be happy too. I love you, I…”  
  
“Don’t say that to me anymore. It’s not yours to say.” Ginny pushed her chair away from the table and got to her feet. “You can get an early Portkey home in the village. I’m staying until tomorrow, alone, and when I get back… I’ll tell the family to leave off you. But you’ll need to stay away from me until I’ve dealt with this. And I’ll be sending you a list of our wedding vendors, since you never paid any attention yourself, and you can cancel everything. I’ll be humiliated enough when the paper gets wind of this.”  
  
“Will you tell them…”  
  
“I’d hope you know me better than that, Harry.”  
  
“I do, I’m sorry. You can tell them I’m gay, if that helps. That I was hiding it. I’d rather the affair not be published, though, for his sake. In case he decides he doesn’t want me after all.”  
  
For just a moment her face softened. “Who wouldn’t want you, Harry? I certainly did.” She turned and walked away, and a moment later the bathroom door closed.  
  
Harry gathered his things and started toward the village. He needed to see Draco right away, he knew, but what if it was already too late?  
  
~~~  
  
“Harry.” Draco’s brow creased. “What are you doing here?”  
  
“Why did you leave early?” Harry pushed his way into Draco’s flat. “Why didn’t you stay?”  
  
“Well, as I arrived about ten minutes before you did and saw my intended with a very ginger head of hair lodged directly between her legs, I decided to slip back to my room without being seen. From what I overheard they’d reversed their positions by the time you arrived, and you, of course, have the grace of a Blast-Ended Skrewt , so naturally you were unable to go unnoticed.” Draco closed the door. “She told me she was sorry, but that she’d seen us on the beach and sorted out for herself what was happening, so she decided to offer Ginevra a bit of… comfort.”  
  
“Oh. I thought they were sloshed.”  
  
“Yours was. Mine… not so much. Turns out we have more in common than I’d initially thought, though she likes men as well. And what of you? Aren’t you supposed to be there until tomorrow? Surely it was the perfect opportunity to make up with her, without me there to get in your way.”  
  
“Draco.” Harry took his hands. “You’re never in the way, and we’re not making up. I came home and she’s staying until tomorrow. I’ve ended things. Well, it was decidedly mutual after I told her I’ve been cheating on her.”  
  
Draco’s expression was stunned. “You told her?”  
  
“I told her. I told her I’m gay, and that I’ve been with you for a year.”  
  
“But what about your family?”  
  
Harry shrugged. “You were right, Draco. If they’re my family, they will eventually forgive me and still care for me. If not, then… you’re all the family I need. And maybe a cat… would you like to have a cat?”  
  
Draco choked out a laugh. “You’re asking me to get a cat? I’m sorry, I’m having trouble wrapping my head around this.”  
  
“You were right. I’ll say it again, just for you. I love her, but all I was doing was hurting her and I made it worse in the end. You and I have something special, and it’s something I’m just not willing to let go. I want to be happy, and I want to make  _you_  happy. I want Ginny to be happy, too, and I can’t do that for her. I love her, Draco, but I’m  _in love_  with you.”  
  
Draco’s eyes shone and he pulled Harry close. “Say it again,” he demanded.  
  
Harry kissed him. “I love you, Draco. Is it too late, or will you still have me?”  
  
“You complete tit,” Draco said fondly. “It’s never too late for us.”  
  
“Thank Merlin.”  
  
“I’ve got to write out two letters, and then I’m taking you straight to bed, tying you to the headboard, and keeping you there until I’m satisfied you aren’t leaving.”  
  
“I swear I won’t leave, never again. Who are you writing to?”  
  
“My parents, to tell them the wedding is off, and to Astoria, to tell her the same and to let her know Ginevra is all alone – I’m sure she’ll be happy to go and console her again.”

 

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